cool_skeleton | Genessia IC inbox

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[You will almost never hear this; Papyrus always answers in the first two rings. But if he's dead, in a movie theater, between phones, or extremely busy, then here's...]

HELLO, THIS IS THE GREAT PAPYRUS!! LEAVE YOUR NAME, NUMBER, AND COMPLIMENTS AFTER THE BEEP, AND I'LL RETURN YOUR CALL!

BEEEEEP!!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Beep~]

"Pappy? It's Romani. A man called Mysterio wants to speak to you."

WHO DOESN'T!?

[Man, he's a little busy in-between puzzle-making, Guardianing, and pokemoning! A skeleton's work is never done.]

OKAY, PUT HIM ON!

Is this Pappy?

[He wasn't given the real name.]

PROBABLY, SINCE THE GREAT RANCHER ROMANI JUST CALLED ME THAT!

[He knows the feeling.]

COULD THIS BE MR. MYSTERIO???

[Luckily, Beck couldn't yet see the skeleton to be shocked that it really was a skeleton but that voice sure was something.]

Yes. I'm Mysterio.

Do you have a real name?

[As if his own wasn't also strange - but Romani had given him a nickname so he thinks it likely she's also done the same for this person.]

NICE TO MEET YOU, MR. MYSTERIO! I'M SURE THIS WILL BE A GREAT CONVERSATION!

TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION: YES!

[Ask a simple question...]

[He waits a moment but no extra name was forthcoming.]

.... And your name is?

PAPYRUS!! THE GREAT GUARDIAN OF FAYREN!!! MY OTHER SPECIALTIES INCLUDE FARMING, POKEMONNING, AND SINGING!

AND CHEFFING, LET'S NOT FORGET THAT!

[Even though most would rather.]

Papyrus.

[Still strange but OK.]

Alright. So I hear you're making a very young child work for you. Do you really think that's... right?

[Maybe things just worked differently in this place. Being very new, just arrived, he has no idea what the laws might be.]

THAT'S INCORRECT! MY WORKERS CHOOSE TO THANKS TO MY SHEER GREATNESS AND CHARISMA!!

UNLESS...

OH NO!

DO YOU THINK MY CHARM IS SO GREAT THAT IT UNSUSPECTINGLY BRAINWASHES PEOPLE INTO WANTING TO DO EVERYTHING I WANT???

QUICK! DO YOU SUDDENLY WANT TO WORK FOR ME TOO???

[He winces. What was this...? Taking a deep breath, Beck continues.]

No, I don't want to.

But it might brainwash small children.

OH, OKAY. WELL, IF YOU EVER CHANGE YOUR UNWASHED BRAIN, YOU HAVE MY NUMBER, SINCE YOU'RE USING IT RIGHT NOW!

[A little disappointing, but maybe some people just aren't ready for that kind of responsibility. He was about to breathe a sigh of relief, until...]

OH NO!!! AT LEAST THE BIG CHILDREN ARE SAFE! IS THERE ANY WAY TO KNOW FOR SURE???

Edited 2019-07-13 12:22 (UTC)

You could stop making Romani work and just give her food and a place to stay without doing anything for it.

[This advice won't be misunderstood. Not at all. At least he thinks it's a simple enough concept.]

[What does he look like? Her Pappy?]

UM...THAT'S AN IDEA, BUT I DON'T SEE HOW THAT SOLVES THE POSSIBLE BRAINWASHING ISSUE. IF THAT'S NOT ADDRESSED, I'LL NEVER KNOW IF I'M MAKING OR NOT!!

Let's say that if she insists on doing more work for you, then she must be brainwashed.

Then you'll know.

LET'S NOT! THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS GREAT TO WORK FOR!! THAT WOULDN'T PROVE ANYTHING!

[How dare he insinuate otherwise!]

DO YOU HAVE ANY BETTER TESTS?

[Now he thinks Papyrus is just being stubborn.]

You do know that if you're doing bad things then I will have to stop you.

[Mysterio reminds him of Ted a little, what with the negativity and assurance that there must be a badness going on, somewhere, somehow, and that it was his solemn duty to thwart it. Whatever it was. Despite no given evidence!]

NO, I DON'T! BUT IF I EVER DO SOMETHING BAD, LIKE ACCUSE OTHERS OF FORCING OTHERS TO WORK FOR THEM WITHOUT PROOF, THEN SURE! GO RIGHT AHEAD!!!

Edited 2019-07-13 12:53 (UTC)

It's true I only have the word of a child but, for her protection, it is my responsibility as a hero to look into her claims.

ROMANI'S A CHILD? SHE NEVER SAID SO!

[First he's heard of it! He's not very familiar with humans or how they age.]

SHE CLAIMED THAT I MADE HER...?

That's what it sounded like.

Why does she need to say she's a child? You can see that, can't you?

[This was becoming somewhat exasperating.]

[Not that being a child made any difference to him. Why can't they be just as great as adults? Papyrus is confident in their abilities.]

UM, I DON'T THINK AGE IS SOMETHING YOU CAN SEE. NUMBERS ARE KIND OF ABSTRACT THAT WAY.

W-WELL, I'LL ASK, THEN! HOLD ON!!

[Boy did he not want to think about the implications if his employees/friends thought he was compelling them to, and not in the charismatic way.]

Edited 2019-07-13 13:23 (UTC)

[About twenty minutes later...]

NYEH HEH HEH! I JUST TALKED TO THE GREAT RANCHER ROMANI, AND SHE SAID SHE OFFERED TO HELP OF HER OWN FREE WILL! SO MY INCREDIBLE CHARM HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT MOSTLY!!

THAT'LL TEACH YOU TO IMPUGN THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND HIS GREAT EMPLOYEES!!

Edited 2019-07-13 23:41 (UTC)

Yes, I'm here.

[He listens and frowns to himself.]

You're still calling her an employee.

AND WHY WOULND'T I!? SHE DOES A GOOD JOB, WHICH IS WHAT EMPLOYEES DO!!!

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